|Past Cries From the Sasquatch Housekeeper
in chronological order
1/15/02 Welcome to the long awaited, highly anticipated, and uncomfortably self indulgent official launch of solyoni.com. This site brings you, the fan, closer to solyoni, the icons.
After their most recent open stage tour of Athens Ohio in October, solyoni felt they were perhaps becoming too big for their fans. Images of Aulisio, Lurie, and Gordon turning the cold shoulder towards autograph hungry coffee house patrons haunted the band for months. Put yourself in their shoes. Would you want to sign 2 or 3 autographs after a mentally and physically draining 15 minute set of unprecedented post-folk-pop? At the time, solyoni was unaware of their increasing untouchability and rapid rise to mega stardom. The concept of making a coffee drinker stop to ponder the music for 12 seconds before stepping outside for a smoke was no longer a dream, but a reality. Would the fans embrace solyoni's new found popularity, or would they turn away in a fit of hipster rage?
During a spirited debate on the flat tax, the band decided it was time to return to their roots, and bond with the fans. Make the fans feel appreciated, warm, cozy, and free of all pain and disease. It was time to create solyoni.com. And here it is. The site is still under construction, so if you don't find everything you're looking for, for instance brownie recipes, come back soon, because solyoni's crack web team is working non stop, updating the site regularly to provide you, the fan, with everything you need to fully support your wholesome solyoni lifestyle.
There's a lot going on in the solyoni world. The band is going through a transition period with its members currently spread out between Seattle and Shady Side. Yet, with the expected success of their new ep, "sadness & kickball," the future looks not only busy, but also bright, like a burning tortilla chip caught in the pilot light of a stove top.
1/27/02 Solyoni has just moved one step closer to Nelly Furtado on the Billboard charts as their new ep 'sadness & kickball' has gone balsa wood, reaching the lofty sales mark of 1 copy sold. The transaction took place at Schoolkids Records in Athens Ohio last week. No word yet on who the lucky purchaser was, but we hope our CD will become the soundtrack to the remainder of their living days.
• Solyoni co-frontman Dan Lurie recently finished up a short west coast tour with his brother, Black Rider recording artist Robert Lurie. The tour began and ended at the Main Street Ale House in Kingston Washington on Dec. 27. Here's the set list of their stunning debut performance together.
1. french bread
2/17/02 solyoni mp3s are here! That's right. Now you too can enjoy the oatmeal smooth sounds of solyoni from your own personal computer. Visit our audio section and you'll discover a rotating selection of songs ranging from the timeless tracks of solyoni's elusive debut album 'swamp dirges,' to cutting edge new material. Coming soon to the audio section; Japanese B-sides, and ridiculously hard-to-find live recordings. If you're looking for a specific solyoni song and don't find it, please send us an email. We'll do our best to make your requests available for downloading.
• In other solyoni news, the 'sadness & kickball' ep has just gone from balsa wood to vulcanized rubber, doubling its sales totals to an unprecedented 2 copies sold. Once again, the transaction took place at Schoolkids in Athens Ohio.
3/9/02 Sales figures for solyoni's new ep 'sadness & kickball' continue to boggle the mind. Recently, it was reported that Schoolkids Records in Athens OH completely sold out their inventory of the critically acclaimed recording. That's right. All three copies we gave them disappeared within a matter of several months. Those in Appalachia need not worry though, as a new shipment has been received and should be on the shelves as we speak.
• solyoni completists take note. The band has inked a deal with The Athens Film Festival. The heart-wrenching anthem 'sodabread canoe' will be included on a compilation CD featuring musicians with an Athens connection, in support of the festival. Sales will help fund this long-standing, and highly entertaining annual celebration of independent films. The CD will be available in Athens this spring.
4/3/02 Those in the Seattle area should head on over to Mr. Spot's Chai House in Ballard tomorrow (Thursday 4/4). Besides their usual selection of Chai tea, the House will be offering up a thirst-quenching musical lineup of mildly epic proportions. Chai patrons will witness a delicately powerful solo set from solyoni's Dan Lurie. Following Lurie will be Aaron Semer, a man whose post-contemporary, pre-medieval, semi-sweet songcraft could potentially move you to cry and/or wash his car. The show starts around 8 p.m.
4/26/02 It looks like solyoni co-frontmen Dan Lurie and Dominic Aulisio have finally worked out their differences with the corporate executives at Velvet Fallopian Tube productions. The label has agreed to finance all aspects of an upcoming concept album in which Lurie and Aulisio will travel across country in an unreliable compact Honda automobile. Along the way the duo will write songs of the road, and eat plenty of beef jerky. It seems Velvet Fallopian Tube was ready to nix the deal when Aulisio demanded that the label pay for upwards of 5 pounds of jerky per travel day. In the end both sides compromised and it was agreed the Tube would pay for 3 pounds of jerky and one container of that jerky chaw stuff per day.
The dynamic duo will travel north from Ohio, then head west through the Dakota badlands. If they manage to survive the difficult terrain, they will eventually wind up in Seattle. Once there, they will begin a feverish 48 hour recording session in which they will take the songs created during the road trip and turn them into a glorious conceptual album set to be released this summer by Velvet Fallopian Tube Productions. The excitement level is high for this album, especially since no one has any idea what Lurie and Aulisio will create on the road. Giving this much creative freedom to the demented pair is a huge gamble for Velvet Fallopian Tube, as for all they know the duo could arrive in Seattle with twelve songs about beef jerky, which may or may not be a bad thing.
solyoni's third key member, Bethany Gordon will not be making the trip. she's finishing up her undergraduate work at a university located deep in Ohio. What good this degree will do for a world-famous rock star, no one is quite certain. But rest assured, Gordon's fleeting vocals and kinder-jamboree instrumental melees will resurface very soon.
Without the presence of Gordon for the Seattle sessions, the group will be collaborating with numerous Northwest musicians including recently signed drummer John Kilian, and sound engineer Aaron Semer. Creating orchestral string arrangements for the album will be a mysterious yet talented man who requested to be referred to simply as 'Divita. '
Updates on this project as it progresses will of course be found here at solyoni.com! The Journey begins mid-May.
6/16/02 OK people. You might want to take notes. The issues at hand are...
1. What in the name of Moses happened to Dan and Dom on the road?
2. What's this I hear about solyoni having brand new songs available for downloading at this very website, and when will Dan, Dom, and Bethany reunite to complete the road trip album, tentatively titled, 'Prairie Monsters?'
3. Is it true that Dan Lurie's brother, Black Rider recording artist Robert Lurie is coming to Seattle at the end of June to work with the Northwest contingent of solyoni on a new collaborative ep?
And the answers...
1. In short, Dan and Dom never made it to Seattle. The things they experienced and witnessed during their journey will be filed away in the annals of American lore. For now, we've created a 'Dan and Dom On the Road' page featuring an inspiring/disturbing photo documentary so that you can better understand what happened during their travels. Check it out.
2. Since our demented duo was unable to make it to Seattle together, the new album is being put on hold for now. The good news is, while on the road, Aulisio and Lurie penned at least a dozen fresh tunes for the upcoming project. A few of the titles... 'The Legend of Wily Granger and the City with No Sidewalks,' 'Toe Nail Moon,' and 'Trucker Shoe Polish Shoe Shine Machine.'
• You don't have to wait for the new album to get a sampling of the new material though. Shortly after finally making it back to Seattle, Dan Lurie hit The Basement studio with new solyoni drummer Jon Kilian, and sound engineer/songsmith Aaron Semer of The Plains, to record 2 of the road-inspired tracks, 'Gold Mime Robberies,' and 'Amusement Park Untitled.' MP3s of these fresh tracks are available in the audio section. Be prepared: on 'Gold Mime Robberies,' solyoni adds drums and goes electric for the first time!
As for the rest of the album, there are hopes that Dom and Bethany will make it to Seattle sometime this summer for an inspired recording session spanning several days to complete solyoni's much-anticipated second full-length release.
3. The rumors are true. Robert Lurie will be coming to Seattle at the end of the month. Last winter, Robert and solyoni's Dan Lurie arranged a number of tunes and are now prepared to record them in The Basement studio with the aforementioned pair of musicians, Jon and Aaron. If all goes according to plan, an ep will be released this summer. Here's a list of possible tracks:
1. Burt Reynolds' Heart
That's it for now. Keep checking back, as there is certainly a lot going on in the solyoni world. Oh, and there will be an essay exam on this material at the end of the semester.
7/10/02 Velvet Fallopian Tube Productions is thrilled to welcome The Yakuza to the solyoni music family!
9/18/02 The wait is over!
11/17/02 Big news out of The Yakuza camp this week. Here's the story as reported by the Associated Press:
LURIE BROTHERS NEWS
5-4 SUPREME COURT RULING FORCES EDGY POP-ROCK ACT TO CHANGE ITS NAME
AP-In the most bitterly contested string of legal rulings since the Florida Recount, the United States Supreme Court has finally weighed in on the burning question of who gets to retain the coveted band name "The Yakuza." By a 5-4 vote, the Justices have decided in favor of the Chicago-based band who originally held that name, despite the mushrooming popularity of the newer, edgier Seattle-based Yakuza helmed by Brothers Daniel and Robert Lurie.
In defiance of the majority ruling, Justice Clarance Thomas wrote a somewhat convoluted dissenting opinion, which read, in part: "The landmark case of Plessy vs. Fergusson establishes a clear precedent that the name 'Yakuza' should rightfully belong to the group of musicians who sing about Burt Reynolds."
Yakuza 2 drummer/banjo player Aaron Semer, no regular fan of Justice Thomas, nevertheless had this to say of the dissenting opinion: "It's just a shame, really, that such an eloquent argument could not sway the other Justices. What does that say about our country?"
Jon Kilian, another member of the West Coast Yakuza, held a packed press conference two hours after the ruling to announce his intention to move to Canada out of protest.
After consulting with their attorneys, the Brothers Lurie unveiled an ingenious two-prong strategy. Quoth Dan Lurie: "Rob did an IMDB search and discovered that an alternate title to the film 'The Yakuza' (The Robert Mitchum thriller from which the band's name is derived) was 'The Brotherhood of The Yakuza.' So we are now The Brotherhood of the Yakuza. Actually, I like this new name better, because, you know, we're brothers. Plus, it allows us to retain our 10 Japanese fans."
Brother Rob added, "On the advice of our attorneys, we are sending a copy of our debut EP back in time to the year 1995, before the other Yakuza was formed. We will proceed to unearth this copy and then sue the other Yakuza for stealing our name."
In response to a clarification question from FOX News, Lurie added, "Yes, Dan discovered the secret of time travel, by accident, while he was at a party at Ohio University. But this is the first time we've used it since that debacle with the Mary Celeste"
Lurie refused to elaborate on this comment.
Undaunted by the legal setbacks, The Brotherhood of The Yakuza intends to go ahead with recording plans for Christmas 2002. Says Jon Kilian: "Dan recently discovered AC/DC and he's been playing these really meaty rock riffs. His falsetto singing is also coming into its own. Think 'Dirty Mind'-era Prince. Rob just bought a couple of 'House of Pain' records at a garage sale and he's now writing nothing but rap lyrics. You think I'm kidding, don't you?"
Brotherhood of The Yakuza's first full-length LP, tentatively titled "The Friends of Audrey Green" is due out Summer 2003.
1/17/03 Happy Festivus and merry New Year. Well as you know we've been paying much more attention to Brotherhood of The Yakuza lately here at solyoni.com. So with the dawn of a new year, now is the perfect time to provide a complete update on both bands in the solyoni music family, yes the legendary solyoni and the increasingly volatile project Brotherhood of The Yakuza. We'd also like to mention that the crack video team at Velvet Fallopian Tube Productions is scouring the archives so we can finally post long-awaited video footage of classic solyoni performances as well as the recent Brotherhood of The Yakuza holiday romp. We'll let you know when the videos are up and running.
• We begin with Brotherhood of The Yakuza: Brothers Dan and Robert Lurie had an extremely active Christmas week in Seattle. For the second straight year, the duo invaded the Main Street Ale House in Kingston for a set of music so intense locals were asking for water and begging for Hall & Oates covers by the time the Brotherhood took the stage for their encore. Be careful what you ask for.
Two days after their inspired set, the brothers Lurie teamed up once again with Aaron Semer of The Plains to record a new song entitled "Plantain(sp?) Farmer." For now, we're keeping this one in our vault, but it's a shoe-in for The Brotherhood's first full length album slated for completion this summer. The group already has 5 or 6 songs in the can, and plans to record 6 more masterworks which are apparently still hiding in our brains somewhere.
• As for solyoni: The band that started it all has been on a long hiatus. Geographic boundaries have limited the demented trio's ability to collaborate lately, but don't be shocked if solyoni's long-awaited concept album, "Prairie Monsters," containing songs penned during the fabled road trip of frontmen Dominic Aulisio and Dan Lurie, finds it's way into record stores by the end of the summer. When the timing is right, the group will hit the studio and finally unveil the musical version of a road story so twisted we didn't even have to make it up. Just to wet your appetite, here's a list of possible songs for inclusion on Prairie Monsters:
1.Amusement Park Untitled
3/16/03 Wow. Have we got a treat for you? Indeed. Solyoni.com is proud to introduce a brand new section to our website. It's called "Letters From Rob Pilatus." The former Milli Vanilli star has inexplicabley taken up an interest in the Solyoni Music Family. We weren't sure how to react, so we've created a forum for Pilatus to sound off on all things related to solyoni and Brotherhood of The Yakuza, and some things that don't have anything to do with anything. Do yourself a favor and check out Rob's words of wisdom by clicking here!
5/24/03 "Some said it couldn't be done. Others said it was an impossible dream. But 5 minutes into scarecrow country, we were nowhere near where we needed to be." Dominic Aulisio - 5/14/2002, two days into last spring's Solyoni road trip debacle.
TODAY we are proud to announce Solyoni is back! Exactly one year after the ill-fated roadtrip of solyoni co-frontmen Dominic Aulisio and Dan Lurie, the duo reunited in Seattle for a fevered week of musical exploration. While Lurie and Aulisio failed to accomplish their first goal (seeing "Bullettproof Monk" before it left theaters), they did find time to team up for the first live solyoni performance in over two years. And before the week was up, the duo joined forces with Cary Logrande, Aaron Semer, and Jon Kilian, acclaimed members of the Solyoni Music Family's Seattle contingent. The group assembled in The Basement of The Little Mustard House and knocked out three extremely experimental tracks, "Trucker Shoe Polish Shoe Shine Machine," "Albert Lee Hey Hey," and "Vacuuming the Snow." Now, as a special treat to our fans, solyoni.com has added an exciting new page that captures some of the highlights of last week's action. It's the Return of Solyoni page! Click here to see photos and exclusive video clips! of solyoni in the studio recording brand new tracks for the long-awaited and still unfinished "Prairie Monsters" album. Enjoy!
6/24/03 Wow! Concert season is in full effect in Seattle. First, Boston plays the White River Ampitheater. Now, Dan Lurie, of Solyoni and Brotherhood of The Yakuza fame, plays the Hop Vine Pub! Lurie will be the third and final act of the Singer/Songwriter Showcase Monday June 30. Lurie will take the stage at exactly 9:30 p.m. for a 45 minute set of alarming original tunes. Accompanying Lurie on stage will be celebrity guest musicians including Aaron Semer and Jon Kilian of The Plains, and José Sandoval of Weapons of Ass Destruction (W.O.A.D.). The show is free thanks to Mr. Lurie's ongoing battle with Ticketmaster. If you are in the mood to spend money however, a new Solyoni Music Family anthology entitled "Hits & Misses (2000-2003)" will be available for $5. The CD contains over 40 minutes of material from The Solyoni Music Family, ranging from Solyoni's rare debut album "Swamp Dirges" to unreleased demos of future projects, and scaldingly hot Brotherhood of The Yakuza romps. We hope to see you Monday night at the Hop Vine Pub on 15th Avenue on Seattle's Capitol Hill. For directions, click here.
8/6/03 Tons of news in Solyoni land my friends. Please take notes.
11/22/03 So you haven't heard from us in a while. That doesn't mean we're not busy. Why, just last week I bought some new socks. Other than that, Solyoni continues to make great strides on their long-awaited "Prairie Monsters" concept album. Solyoni's Dan Lurie, Dominic Aulisio and Bethany Gordon reunited last month, first in Athens Ohio to record with talented digital audio guru Adam Fox. Then they traveled to Wilmington North Carolina, where they met up with Robert Lurie to continue recording and to listen to Lurie's vinyl collection which includes Daryl Hall's solo album and an album of nothing but Doctor Who sound effects. Of course, we wouldn't let Solyoni get away with all of this without sending the solyoni.com camera crew to document the entire trip, warts and all. So here it is, ladies and gentleman, exciting VIDEO CLIPS and exclusive PHOTOS of Solyoni in North Carolina as they continue their endless quest towards the completion of "Prairie Monsters." It's the CAROLINA SESSIONS page! This is the kind of juicy in-depth coverage you'll only find at solyoni.com. So please check it out for a preview of the album that, out of sympathy, you will feel obligated to buy.
02/17/04 While Solyoni closes in on the completion of "Prairie Monsters," we figure now is the perfect time to open up the video vault and treat the fans to some old video clips that might help you see just how far the band has come over the years (not very far at all). We've created a page we like to call Memory Lane. Included on this page is footage from Solyoni's Marble Madness Tour in the fall of 2000, most notably a rare glimpse at Solyoni's legendary six-sided keyboard, "The Calliope of Doom," (see picture above). Yes, it's the one Dom stole from those poor elementary school kids in rural Ohio. Enjoy!
05/23/04 The fine folks at Global Seepej Records have been kind and foolish enough to invite Solyoni to play at their 8th Anniversary party on Saturday June 5 at the Mars Bar/Cafe Venus in Seattle. Also playing that night, At the Spine, The Plains, Colin Spring, Bit Part, LKN, and an all-star Black Sabbath cover band featuring members of the aforementioned groups, plus a cameo by the Green Machine Frog Band. It's like Coachella without the heat and The Pixies and Radiohead and The Cure.
07/03/04 Solyoni will be playing the Tractor Tavern in beautiful Ballard next Sunday July 11 with Hex County, Michael Miller and A.C. Cotton. This is an early "Hangover Helper" show beginning at 4:30 p.m. Admission is $5, but if you bring a Hattie's Hat brunch receipt, you get in for half-price! The event is sponsored by the wonderful people at NadaMucho.com. Who needs church when you can spend your Sunday worshiping these fine bands?
08/24/04 You've waited two and a half years to ignore this moment, but believe it or not, it is here. Yes, that's right, Solyoni's seemingly cursed conceptual album, "Prairie Monsters," hopped the river on a trampoline Tuesday August 24. The album, based on Dan Lurie and Dominic Aulisio's now legendary road trip debacle in May of 2002, has been released on Velvet Fallopian Tube Records, in association with Black Rider Productions and Global Seepej Records. Wherever you are in the world, you can now purchase this historic piece of music through our friends at CDBaby.com. There, you can also listen to audio samples of every song. Those of you in the Seattle area can buy Prairie Monsters at any Sonic Boom Records store. Anyone interested in ordering the album directly from us, can send an email to firstname.lastname@example.org. Solyoni and friends will be celebrating this momentous achievement with a CD release party Sunday August 29 at the Rendezvous Jewel Box Theatre in Seattle. The CD release show will be a reunion of sorts, as Dominic Aulisio and Bethany Gordon will be flying in from Ohio to join the Seattle contingent of Solyoni for what should prove to be a memorable night of music and merry-making. The infamous Grant Cogswell will serve as master of ceremonies, and Seattle band Whatever Zoe will open the show. We hope to see you all there, and we look forward to finally sharing this album with you. These are exciting days.
09/16/04 We wouldn't let our CD release party slip by without enlisting the help of our own media circus. Thanks to their help, we now present to you the Solyoni CD Release Party Page. The event was a huge success, and now you can feel like you were there, even if you weren't and even if you were. We've got videos from the show, and countless photos documenting the most historic week in Solyoni's storied history. Enjoy!
04/10/05 Fresh off a winter hybernation period, Solyoni is feeling fresh, hungry and spry with a few new songs tucked neatly in their collective back pocket. Come to the Crocodile in Seattle this Tuesday April 12 to see if the long rest did them any good. The show is scheduled for 9 p.m. with Solyoni opening for The Glasses and The Orphan Project.
06/04/05 Solyoni's 2005 Summer World Tour kicks off Saturday June 11 with a solo performance by Dan Lurie at the Global Seepej Records 9th Anniversary Party at Mars Bar/Cafe Venus. For details, and to see the other 2 dates that will make up this globe-trotting journey through Seattle, please visit the shows page, or simply shift your eyes slightly to the right.
08/02/05 It's been over three years since Dan Lurie and Dominic Aulisio found themselves trapped in Buffalo, Wyoming, the town that brought an unfortunate and ugly end to the roadtrip that inspired the album Prairie Monsters. Recently, Lurie gathered his courage and returned to the place where everything fell apart. We went ahead and stole his diary, obtained some photos from the paparazzi, and now present to you, a page we're calling Return to Buffalo. Check it out.
01/02/06 Happy New Year! We have a special holiday treat for you and yours. It's the Solyoni Island Sessions Page! That's right. The band is deep into the recording process for their next album, and they're braving the elements to do it. Phase one took place on a primitive island somewhere in the Pacific Northwest. Once we heard that Solyoni had been stranded on an island, we sent a freelance photographer and some film students to the scene to capture images and video footage of this remarkable battle between music and nature. We think you'll be astonished by what you see. Enjoy!